Oxymoronic!

People of Albania!

2007-06-11T00:45:00.000+08:00

Well, you never know when one of them might drop by; but Bush didn't send troops during the Kosovo conflict, Clinton did. Guess what Bush did though? Declare war on an oil-rich country with no WMDs present anywhere on Iraqi soil.

Cool?

A Father's Portrait

2007-05-29T00:23:00.001+08:00

This is a story of a father's role, a father's duty and most importantly, a father's solemn vow. But it is not a story to be told within these written words, instead it will be expressed in the picture below.

A father's role is an educational one; bringing his child up to know the difference between what is right and what is wrong. A father's duty is that of a guardian; protecting his child from whatever harm that may come. A father's solemn vow is one that is enduring; always being there, whenever his child needs him.

If you are a father, always be proud of your child. If you are a son, always be proud of your father.

Image Source: My Archives

Life is a Scone

2007-05-27T22:29:00.000+08:00

Don't ask me why I'm saying this, but 'Life is a scone'. I sat down today at ~~Starbucks~~ Coffeebean with Zijill, and I was eating a scone, thinking "Ahh, this is the life..." and somehow, that got translated to 'Life is a Scone'.

I mean, it's only good if it's hot, and you can't simply enjoy it on its own. Well, you could, but it wouldn't be as good as, oh say, buttering it up and putting a layer of jam on it.

So, Life is a scone. Yeah, I'm a friggin' scholar.

Image Source: Getty Images

Women!

2007-05-26T22:08:00.000+08:00

Can someone please tell me; 'WHY ARE WOMEN SO BLOODY COMPLICATED??!!'

Seriously, I mean what do they want? I guess this requires some background.

*Cue dreamy-looking scene*
I was once a very controlling boyfriend; Whatever my girlfriend was doing, whenever she was doing it, I needed to know. I mean like every detail, who's going with her, what time she'll be done, how she's gonna get back home, right down to a background of the friends who are going (that is if I didn't already know them.

However, after losing one to this volatile habit of mine, I toned down a little, only asking for the most rudimentary of information like the 'what are you doing?'-s and the 'when'-s, which I thought was pretty reasonable. Wasn't a boyfriend supposed to at least know what his girlfriend was doing?

Even that was too much. One thing you have to understand, I'm not like the other guys, I have issues with insecurity and I have a need to know everything. I won't chalk it up to me being concerned or anything, I was just a control freak; insecure and hating any situation that I'm not in control of.

So, I worked to get rid of my insecurities, and I worked very hard for it. I can proudly say that I can call you up(if you were my girlfriend, that is), and if you say you're out drinking with some friends, I'm not going to go beyond that. If you wanted to divulge more information, you would. If not, then it'll be a conversation piece the next day.

*Cut flashback*

Now, apparently, being controlling = caring. That's right, being controlling means you bloody care. SINCE WHEN???!! I really have no idea.

How did I find this out? Well, that's another story in itself, but it can be summed up as 'boy likes girl, girl likes other guy'. Now, this other guy isn't her boyfriend, but treats her like she is anyway and controls every single aspect of her life. I mean this girl reports every move she makes.

I ask her why, "Because he said so". They both work in the same office btw, which was why I was surprised when they argued over her not IM-ing her that she was leaving the office (I was driving her to college for a party). Best part? She already APOLOGIZED, but the guy wouldn't let go.

And then she can ask me "Why does he care so much?"

Honestly, I really feel like giving up on women, love and the like. So please please, help me understand why women like to complicate matters so much?

Singapore: Lesson's Learnt

2007-04-16T21:25:00.000+08:00

Things that I need to remember in a travelling companion:
1) Must not have bladder the size of a pea
2) Must not fuss over every tiny detail
3) Must have appropriate travelling shoes
4) Must have enough money to split the accomodation costs
5) Must have own perfume/cologne/toothpaste/towel/deoderant/hairspray/gel/hair wax/ (I could go on)
6) Must definitely be interested in waking earlier
7) Must understand that I am anal about timing

That is all

Brief Update

2007-04-16T21:23:00.000+08:00

I'VE GOT A NEW JOB!!!!

Irony

2007-04-10T19:37:00.000+08:00

Like, you've got to appreciate the irony when the one thing you feared, but everyone kept telling you won't happen so much that you finally believed them. And one day, it does happen.

Irony...

I tried smoking today...

2006-07-08T01:07:00.000+08:00

Yeah, like the title says; I tried smoking today. It was a really long day; woke up early to meet with the clients, present some creatives, sell sell sell, "Yes ma'am, it'll look better if we did it your way ma'am, but don't you think the target market would be bla bla bla bla bla,"-ing all the way til I finally got it approved, then driving back, coordinating 3 projects at the same time while juggling another big one that came up last minute.

After all that was done, or rather it should've been over when the files left the building, I sat down with a colleague who was smoking. Feeling stressed out, I just asked, "Boleh tak?" while pointing to her cig pack and she said yeah and promptly handed it to me.

Only after she saw me light up did she ask, "Hey, since when did you smoke?".

"About now..." I replied as I took my first puff in a long long time.

And I took a really long puff, exhaling after what seemed like an eternity of sucking on that damned filter and I felt... nothing...

I never really understood the concept of smoking, even when I was addicted to it more than 10 years ago. I mean, i drew no sense of calm out of it, I definitely didn't feel any cooler after smoking than I was before I started. All I did feel was light-headed, but I could bloody well achieve the same effect by spinning myself round and round til I got dizzy and dropped to the floor.

So what is the deal with smoking anyway? Why do so many people smoke? I mean you pay a good RM5.50 (or something close to that price) for a 14's pack just to get a dry throat, yellowed teeth and a high that can be achieved with a good chair on wheels? See, if anyone of you ever caught me paying for a pack of ciggarettes, I want you to take that pack, smash it into my head and call me 'potty-mouth' or 'asshole' or something, use your imagination.

I mean, I struggled with just that one stick; my throat felt funny, my can of coke tasted weird, just very very weird, and I had tar breath for the rest of the day. How some people can finish even a pack a day is beyond me.

Ugh, I think that'll be my last stick for the rest of my life. Now I gotta get me another glass of water, my throats feeling funny all over again.

Welcome to hell!

2006-06-06T22:03:00.000+08:00

Ladies and Gentlemen, that time has come. What? You don't know what that time is? Come on! It's been discussed for centuries already in every freaking holy book you can find. You know, fire raining from the skies, ground splitting earthquakes swallowing people whole and let us not forget, trees falling down on cars, giving their owner many many headaches.

Yes, that's right, trees falling down on cars! Two people in my office today had the shock of their lives when they walked to their cars (which btw was parked in the church nearby... spooky coincidence) and of course they found their cars in a state of disrepair, well one of them at least. Another one couldn't even find his car because it was hidden under a whole fucking tree! A WHOLE FUCKING TREE!!!! IN A CHURCH!!!

Well, he might have a chance though; bulk of the tree hit the car next to his, so he might have just been hit by branches. Damn it, of all the times for me to be too lazy to take pictures! But i did get this shot of this tree though

Now, this is just ONE of those trees, there were a whole lot more that were stuck down by god knows what. Was too ~~engrossed~~ bored in a meeting with my clients so I didn't really get a good look at what happened.

By the way, the damage was only limited to areas surrounding that church which is kinda freaky... jeng jeng jeng!

My World in Color

2006-04-16T13:14:00.000+08:00

They say the pictures you take tell people more about yourself. It is a means of self expression only with nothing said or done; only a picture to say what you have always wanted to say. A picture is like a mirror into the deepest part of your soul, exposing your innermost secrets. Well, at least that's what I think.

My office has this hallway where they put up pictures taken by employees and they've put up a sign that has a very meaningful quote; "No place is boring if you've had a good night's sleep and have a pocketful of unexposed film". No idea who said it (mainly because I never really paid attention to it) but it was a nice quote.

I was asked recently if I was a kaki gambar(camwhoreus sapien or photographer in plain english) to which I of course said that I was. So now, I'm considering putting up my photos on the hall; that is to say after my boss has had his run of the place. Below are a few of the photographs I'm going to submit.

That's only a few of what I have planned for the wall. I still have a lot more pictures to take though. I found another quote online that is quite meaningful too;

"The mission of photography is to explain man to man and each man to himself" -Edward Steichen

An Open Letter to my (so-called) friends

2006-02-17T01:12:00.000+08:00

Dear all,

As you all may well know, things have not exactly been good between me and you. It doens't matter who YOU are, but we all know things haven't exactly been all sunshine and butterflies since a few months ago.

"So, What is this letter all about?" you might ask. Well, I'll tell you what it's about. It's about how double standard you all have become, making me feel like such a jerk when really it's you buggers who are the jerks. No, it's not only just you, it's been a lot of other people; People who say I'm boastful, who say I'm always trying to bring a person down and who say I'm not a nice guy to hang out with.

Well, after analyzing all that you have said, I have decided that the only appropiate response would be "Bullshit!" Now, don't take offence into what I've said. Instead think about why I'm saying this.

You all say I'm boastful, but yet are braggarts yourself, talking about how much the shit you'll be in the future and also how proud you are for turning down a job that I took. No, those two aren't the only examples I can cite, I'm just too lazy and quite frankly, those two occasions are the ones most prevalent in my mind right now.

I'm also particularly mad at some of you for complaining that I'm saying I work for a ~~A REALLY HUGE!~~ company when I really didn't. Well, then, explain why my payslip comes from said company, and explain why, oh why does my contract have the name of said company on it?

Well, since you aren't satisfied with my ~~lying~~ "exaggeration", how's this? I NOW DO WORK FOR THAT COMPANY! That's right, that's fucking right, I was transfered into another team, under which the account is under said company.

But I digress, so it's time to get back to the matter at hand. So I'm boastful huh? Okay fine, so what if I am always talking about how cool my job is or how cool my new toy is? You want to feel inferior, up to you; but most friends would also enjoy my newfound toy with me and not complain about how he/she doesn't have it. Oh, boo hoo hoo.

AND let me say that you are guilty of the same thing. You are all boastful as well, you with your "I'm so proud for turning down that job because it's just one account" and "Oh, I got a free car and a free drum set" and "Oh, I'm so bored in Australia" and "We fired him! Get me kuachi to tell you the story" and "..." okay, I can't think of any other whines I've heard at all now but I know there's a whole lot more. You all do it! So it is my god-given right to yak my mouth off to make myself feel better.

You say I talk about nothing related to what you're talking about, well how about filling me in then? "Oh sure, we'll tell you what it's about when we feel like it" then I'm just gonna talk inane bullshit some more until you do then so shut up, kthxbai.

You know, at least I don't claim I'm not a braggart. Hell, I know I am; it's an impulse I can't control, so if you don't want to hang out with me? Pfft, fine by me bitches. Your loss anyway.

So, here's my vow to you; I won't call you, so whenever you feel like coming out or perhaps even talking to me, YOU can give ME a call instead of the other way around. That's a way better deal for me because then, we'll see who's the real friend here and who isn't plus I save on phone bills.

Until then, think about this letter and the context it was written. Sure it was written in rage, but it was also written with love. Although you'd think it was written with love for myself. If you do, fuck you. If you don't.. well.. I am at a loss for a response..

Kthxbai,
Arin Askandar @ Kiruna Kenosawa @ The Fired Friend (Yeah, fuck you too)

P/S If you all want to think of this as a perfectly good reason to burn the bridges, by all means, please do. The last thing I need in life are fake friends like you. But if you have even learned an ounce from the 20 odd years of life, you would be able to recognize this as a reason to discuss the issues and although this is posted on my blog, no names were published nor was this post pinged in projectpetalingstreet, so no one but those who stumble here randomly and you are reading this.

HARPY NEW REAR!!!11one

2006-01-01T00:14:00.000+08:00

You know what I love most about my place? It's the balcony, especially at night.

I especially love it when it's a really special night because I get to see some of the coolest fireworks displays from my balcony. Today I got a real eyeful; 10 fireworks displays going off simultaneously, a full 180 degrees of night sky filled with sparkling lights and once silent skies filled with back to back explosions.

And it's times like these that I like to reflect on my life. So, since every other blogger is doing it, here's a freaking summary of my life in 2005:

Had a freaking good time interning at McCann Erickson. Got my first taste of advertising as well as got a campaign under my belt at such an early stage. I am indeed fortunate.
Also had my first taste of blogging with my Internship blog, which served as part of my annual report. Why blog it? Because disks and thumbdrive, as stable as they may be, can also corrupt data. At least on the net, it's safe from digital wear and tear.
Celebrated my first anniversary with my then girlfriend Khim, which was shortlived since she was busy in Brunei while I stayed in KL
Said girlfriend came down for KL's Shopping Carnival to which she spent, I think, more on me than herself. Manhood felt under threat.
Prepared for my last and final semester, organized and executed a Breast Cancer Awareness Campaign among Youths and managed to get a good grade for it. But I still felt I could have done better on my part and for that I apologize to all my group members, if they're reading this.
Lost my grandmother, in the midst of the campaign. Depression begins to creep in.
Campaign done and finished, we celebrated with a pot luck and had fun as a group. Sure it wasn't much, but nothing beats chilling with 12 people around a table full of food.
Broke up with Khim. A decision that I have always regreted but it was all said and done.
Met a new friend, Xiao's sister. For some particular reason, she would affect me a lot for the rest of the year.
Joshua returned from Brisbane. The mainstay of the Dizfunqtional crew initiates contact with his old crew and proceeds to execute Operation: Surprise! where only me and Lionel knew he was returning. Even his parents didn't know.
Old gang returns to its old glory. Blogging takes a toll as schedule gets busier and busier.
Interviewed and got a job with Arc WorldWide, an affiliate company of Leo Burnett, one of the top performing agencies in Malaysia.
Something happens between me and xiao's sister, lots of things said. Not even my own mother could have made me feel as bad as I did.
Lost a few friends, depression furthered and for that, I lost friends.

So, 2005 ended real badly for me. I'm really trying my best to mend the ties, starting with Xin because.. I don't really know why really. All I know is that I'd hate to lose her as a friend. So hopefully, I won't lose one next year. I'd like to thank you for reading through this, it's something not many bloggers do really but I appreciate it, I really do.

A whole new life...

2005-12-22T23:38:00.000+08:00

Who would've thought that finishing my studies would open up a whole new life for me? I'm now 21, am well on the way to receiving my degree and now, I've got a new job. But those aren't the reasons I have been missing out on my blogging these days. No, it's a whole other reason which, for personal reasons, shall not be named here. All I can say is that I'm slowly sorting my shit out.

Joshua's back from Brisbane and the Dizfunqtional group is now more active than ever, except for Terence, who is extremely busy with work, and Barry, who isn't as busy but has to work nonetheless. In the past month, we've been doing shit that I would probably never thought of doing when we were all separated (i.e. dangling on the belay line while rock climbing, hitting each other like lil' pendulums, waddling like penguins in the pool). So take my little hiatus as an occasion to do stupid shit in my life before I start working.

In 2 weeks time, I start at Leo Burnett (Well, actually it's Arc Worldwide, but they're associated with LB) as a Brand Integration Executive, which is just a fancy name for 'Man Who Runs Around Office'. I was explained about the difficulties during my interview such as late nights (been there..) and working weekends (done that too..)

It's final, definitely final. I went to the office to sign the employment contract and met the team and all so I start in 2 weeks time. So now it's time to grow up and start being serious in life. I'm still trying to get some form of order in my life; have to get a new suit, a new bank account and a new car to look for and not to forget the new handphone line I have to get; I've been using my Penang line for too long already; it's time to change that.

You want to know what the funniest thing is? After my exams, a friend asked me when I would be looking for a job. I answered, "March next year, cause I wanna bum around before I die!"

Didn't think I'd be one of the earliest fuckers to get a job... Damn...

Long Overdue Post

2005-12-11T20:37:00.000+08:00

Wow, it has been awhile since I last posted. I don't know why really; I've been getting a lot of ideas to post but I lack the mood to type one up or I procastinate it but end up not doing it anyway. A part of me feels like crap while another feels like nothing has changed.

I suppose that the fact that it began as a long distance relationship helped me mainly because, well, I was always alone to begin with, just that I was the boyfriend to someone who wasn't around most of the time.

Ah well, good friends, good company and a good drink; the cure to a lonely heart as many would say.

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What is the Malaysian Dream? Anyone? No, seriously. We have an American Dream, why not a Malaysian one? For my friend who just came back from Australia, it's to be able to eat nasi lemak on the left hand while painting with the right.

The man behind the pictures...

2005-12-01T02:51:00.000+08:00

I spent some time today, cleaning out my closet when I found a collection of pictures that I kept since I was in high school. They're all I have left of what was once my days as a high school student and now, as a college student.

The pictures I liked looking at the most was the group shot of my entire class in college for the Mass Colympics. I went through each and every face, reciting each and every one of their names in my head. They were my diploma class and they were probably the most fun bunch of people to hang out with. I'm sure that if they'd look at the picture (I made copies for them) they'd be thinking all about the whole day and trying to do the same thing as I was; naming everyone in the picture.

But there's one thing missing. I'm not in it. Not one single picture has me in it, not a single group photo, not a single action shot, not even a single picture of me with my friends in it. It was the curse of the photographer; always being the one to take part in the activities but never in any photos, never in any of the memories of those who were also there that day.

This brings me to the gist of my post: Who am I? I am the man behind the pictures, the man who'll always remember the days but not be remembered himself. I am the man who will disappear from your memories with each passing moment, because I am cursed to be this way. I am the man who will never be named, because I'm not in the picture, I'm the man behind it.

And I will be forgotten...

My Chaotic Life

2005-11-28T04:37:00.000+08:00

It's 4.30am right now and I am still awake. Despite the fact that I've only had 3 hours worth of sleep within the last 24 hours, I am still unable to sleep. Too much plagues my mind right now.

All of a sudden, my whole life went from stable and steady to one that is completely topsy turvy and chaotic, pulling me in all sorts of direction. This isn't the first time, but it has been a long time since I've felt this sort of chaos in my heart.

There are times when I find it difficult to breathe, the cause of which I have yet to ascertain, and times when I find that my mind cannot focus at all on anything and times when I refuse to sleep, although I know I want to, for fear of the dreams that might come with it.

Well, there's that and then there's also the fact that Joshua's coming home from Brisbane today and I've got to pick him up. PSYCHE!!!

Happy Birthday YOU OLD FUCK!! Pt. 2

2005-11-26T23:04:00.000+08:00

Right, in my previous post, I mentioned that it was Sher Win's birthday and I even called him an old fuck. I also mentioned that my birthday was 19 days away, so guess what? It's that day! SO HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU, YOU OLD FUCK!!!

That's right, I turned 21 yesterday! And yes, that picture was taken whilst i was wasted and I just woke up. Why? Nursed this:

At the stroke of midnight.. Ahh, legal beer..

That was of course, right after a sudden, and unexpected request to escort Xin, Xiao's older sister to the Malaysian Video Awards friday and me, being the very free (as in, I really have nothing to do) man that I am, said okay. Why not? I loved to see these type of things, I attended the Gunn Report during my tenure with McCann Erickson, I wanted to attend the Kancil Awards but I missed out on it. Although it isn't really advertising related videos, but hell, it's a free movie, as Xin so bluntly puts it.

But the speaker.. was.. BORING!!! Seriously, I was going to fall asleep before the damn thing started!

Haish, but I lasted through it. Some videos were really good and I mean seriously good. Had a few favorites, but if only I could remember the names, eheh. Ah well, had a nice time though, got to go out, take my mind off the chaos that is my life.

But that was Friday night, this is my birthday! So, I wake up reallll early, like 6.30am cause LIONEL FREAKING CALLED ME!! Wei, kawan, not school day okay?? I know la you wanna wish me happy birthday, but 6.30 am man? like 7 people beat you to the wish already. But thanks anyway, dude. At least not like my parents, they totally forgot.

Hint like crazy that it was my birthday and they still didn't get it. Mahai, they even tried to coverline when I told them they forgot my birthday.

Fell asleep, woke up at 10am, did my usual thing in the morning and went to meet the emo xiao for lunch.

Look at that, isn't that the most emo look you can get? Especially from when standing on the escalator?

Anyway, to move on, Xin, having woken up too late for her script writing workshop (Not my fault ar, I already gave you wake up call you don't wanna wake up your problem) And she joins us, then Xiao grabs the camera and decides to camwhore a bit

And she had to take that picture. You can see the blurdy pink bags I'm carrying! They bought shoes wei and they made me carry them! Wei, whose birthday wei??!

Right.. Anyway, That's all for that day, didn't do much after that. Meh, slowest birthday ever..

"Dude, Where's my Question Paper!!??"

2005-11-24T15:14:00.000+08:00

Today has got to be a first for me. I woke up at 7am, to wake up Lionel and then I fell asleep and woke up at 8am myself. No, that's not the gist of this post.

No, no.. the gist is, I had an Effective Reading exam at 9am today. So I hastily got ready and drove to college. I got there just in time to see Mr. Justin briefing my classmates who were already in there.

Jadi, masuklah aku (So, in I go) into the class and took my seat where my answer sheet laid, waiting for me to stab it with my pen and write inane nonsense.

"Okay, you may begin answering the questions" said the chief invigilator, who noted that the exam was now starting on his check pad.

Slowly I flipped through the sheet of paper that was under my desk just before and I flip and flip and I found no question. "Mahai..." I muttered as I put down the paper. Of course la, I thought that maybe it was just my paper, but then I looked around, everyone else also couldn't find.

"Sir, where's the question paper?"

"It's there on your table..."

"No it isn't. It's just text, no questions"

"Odd.."

Yeah, no questions. So after a few minutes, guess what? USM didn't send us the question papers!

Now, imagine if you will, a class of students, some of them are already working and they took a short leave before they had to run off to work again, were sitting for an exam with no questions.

Bugger, I know la it's effective reading, but takkan want to test us to read right? Chi seen! So me and Lionel made jokes!

"So how ar if they don't have the question paper here?" <-- Me

"Of course la they courier!"

"Hahaha, don't tell me have to wait for 5 hours for exam paper"

"Where got, you see la got courier with RXZ flying down the North-South Highway at 200kmph. 2 hours already he's here"

Wah lau, happy la that courier if he could do that. Career opportunity. I can just imagine the conversation:

Chief Examiner: Mat, I need you to send this exam paper to Taylor's College.

Mat: Huh? Where's that?

Chief Examiner: It's in KL

Mat: Huh??

Chief Examiner: Do what you have to, but these papers have to reach Taylor's College by today!

Mat: Okay boss! Boleh ambik RXZ saya tak?

Chief Examiner: Take it la, up to you...

And then those of you travelling the North-South Highway will find a smiling blur flying past you at 200kmph.

HAHAHAHAHAHA

Relevant Links:
Biggest Joke of The Year - Cyber-Red

I Miss the Days...

2005-11-22T23:18:00.000+08:00

Being on holiday, and recently single, has given me time to really reflect on my life. I don't really know whether it's the lonely apartment or the ulcer in the back of my mouth talking, but I miss the days...

When I would sit down with my parents for dinner

When I could go through life without worrying about anything at all

When all I had to do was make a phone call and one of my parents would be here to comfort me

When I didn't have to think about what to do past 5 minutes of when I was thinking

When I was the one doling out advice on how to get that girl to all my friends but yet was hopeless myself

When the world seemed so much more like a happier place

When policemen were honest, or at least when I didn't realize that they weren't

When I could trust everyone and not worry about a thing

When I used to think that Love had actual meaning

What the hell happened to me? When did my entire world fall apart? Am I going insane?
I really have no idea anymore...

Harry Potta' and Da' G!

2005-11-19T22:04:00.000+08:00

You wanna know what I love about going to the movies? It's the way they shorten the names of the movies in the tickets. I've seen some very weird ones but somehow this one struck me. I went to see Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire today. No reviews cause I wasn't really analyzing anything, just admiring Hermione in a dress (Bah! but I digress. Anyway, while waiting for the line to be let through, I notice the name of the movie on the ticket.

So, now what would the G on the ticket signify? Obviously it'd first be:

But nope, first thing that ran in my mind was Harry Potter and the G Unit and quite frankly, I blame that train of thought for the next picture:

As usual, pictures of Harry Potter do not belong to me, not does the picture of G-unit, but that last one and the first picture is my work and is thus watermarked as so. You Harry Potter fans who take offense to this, talk to GSC for writing the ticket the way they did. AHAHAHHAHAHA

I'm So Sorry, So Very Sorry

2005-11-18T21:39:00.000+08:00

I write this with a very heavy heart, but it has to be written. I would like to first say that I acknowledge that the actions described below are indeed jerkish and I do so deserve the title, but in my defense, I didn't really want it to end the way it did, but it did in the end.

Today, at 9.00pm Malaysian Time, I ended my 17 month relationship to a wonderful girl, Khim. She didn't do anything to provoke this ending, it was entirely my decision and I take full responsibility for my actions. I never thought that I'd feel the way I do, but I do nonetheless.

Why did it have to end? For one, she lives in Brunei, a place that I would probably not set foot in for a million years for lack of resources. Sure she comes to Malaysia every once in awhile, but in the 17 months we've been together, I've only been with her for 2 weeks, physically. I know it's a little materialistic but I am a man and I do have needs. I can't go out and do Single's activities because I'm not single anymore nor can I go out and do Couple things because, well, I don't really have a girlfriend handy to go out with.

Another reason is that I am graduating soon and I will start working shortly after. Thus I will more likely be concentrating more on my career than anything else and in so doing, knowing how the advertising industry works, will not have much time for her and that wouldn't be fair to either of us.

The last reason is that, well, I haven't really been introduced to the family, or at least the family doesn't know that I am in fact in her life. It could be a race thing, she being chinese and me, of course, a malay and her parents being your average conservative family would mean that they won't exactly be happy with her decision to date me.

I know it's selfish of me to break up with her for reasons that are so dumb, but I have worried about it for a long time, especially during our first year anniversary when neither of us could be together on that special day of our relationship. 1 year we lasted and I really couldn't have been happier if she could be here or I could be there for her. But I wasn't born privileged, or at least privileged enough to be able to fly to Brunei on a whim and her father doesn't want her to come here because.. well, she doesn't really have reason to...

So if you women want to call me selfish or you guys wanna call me Whipped, do so but know this, I loved and still love her very much. I regreted having to make the call, I regret making that call, and I know I'll forever regret making that call. But nonetheless, it was made and I have to live with that.

Kitty in the hole!

2005-11-17T20:40:00.000+08:00

So, I was driving to my local Giant Hypermarket today when out of the blue, something white came out from under this Harrier in front of me. Now a quick glance would tell me it's something light, until i saw it's eyes.

Yes, it's eyes. It was at that moment that I also saw its mouth and nose and recognized it to be a little kitten. "Oh my GOD!" I screamed and swerved to the right to avoid from turning the poor furry little thing into street pancake. I did well to, the poor frightened little kitten rolled on and on, avoiding more cars (OMG!) and finally landing near the sidewalk.

It was probably the most frightening thing in my life and a nightmare come true, especially since I'm a cat owner. I've often kept my cat away from the front door, teaching her to keep away from it, but she never listens and still keeps peering out of the grill. A cat's curious, what can I say but for the time being, that's as far as her fat furry body goes.

Anyway, I turn the car around, stopping it by the side, looking for the poor kitten, wondering if it might need medical help and if so, I have a regular vet that could probably help out. But to my surprise, it wasn't there anymore. I have no idea what happened. My cat, as a kitten, had been frightened before and she couldn't move for the longest time (3 hours) and that was just from lightning. This cat's gone under a SUV and was nearly crushed by 2 other cars, mahai, how the hell could it still be moving.

There are only two conclusions I can come up with is:
a) Some good samaritan stopped by before I got there to pick up the kitten, presumably for medical care or
b) This cat, being a genetically-engineered Super Cat with absolutely no fears, managed to get up and run away from the scene of the accident before I got there.

Sigh, I can't really blame anyone for this; for all I know the Harrier driver did swerve to avoid the cat, thinking that going in between the tires is still okay. The cat, being a cat, was probably careless but it'd be silly to blame a cat now wouldn't it? Sure, my cat gets blamed for messing up the house but it's still me cleaning up the place.

Traumatic experience yes. It's a vivid reminder of why I keep the blurdy furball in the house at all times.

To Take Down a Plagiarist

2005-11-16T14:53:00.000+08:00

Wow, I didn't expect this to happen but a full fledged war has been declared on Kahsoon.com by just every major player in the Malaysian blogosphere.

All this as a response to his threatening to sue Rojakz. And he cites he knows internet law. Oh wow, a plagiarist talking about internet law and how he's going to sue someone for it.

He's been a walking target for lawsuits for such a long time and now he's getting it right in the cojones. Petitions have been drawn up, buttons made, this is definitely a cause not to be passed.

Aww, and he even made a whiny post asking people to give him a break. OH WOW, he's begging for a break, he must be f0rgiven!!11one. Oh please, he never gave anyone a break, so why should we? Summore ar, he claims that if we're not using WordPress, we should just STFU. Oh wow, you use WordPress? Oh gee, that's right, we should all get on our knees and bow to you right? Fuck you! Using wordpress doesn't make you a better blogger, it's just software, a bunch of code put together to make a superior blogging management system. Did you write the code? I don't think so.

No, what makes a blogger is the capability to churn out ORIGINAL content that reflects what you want to say; it is about typing using more than just three buttons on the blurdy keyboard! So what if he has tons of visitors per month? Means nothing if they're just there for like 3 second, see that it's just a waste of time and then they move their lil' arrows to that nice small X on the top right corner of the window to close it.

Now go sign the blurdy petition!

Other sites that have commented on this issue:
Sign the Petition Againsts KahSoon.com - Alex Allied
Voice out for a Cause - Fading Sanity, Cyber-Red
KahSoon.com become most hate in PPS - Paul Ooi
Kahsoon's HottestBlogger.com threatened - Rojak's Daily

Exams!

2005-11-15T11:57:00.000+08:00

ARGH! God damn it, I had an Islamic Civilization paper yesterday and I've just got one thing to say about it; IT'S A FUCKING KILLER! Bloody hell, already failed it once last semester (Got a C-) and now I'm wondering am I doomed to fail again? By my calculations, I've got 50% of the answers correct, BUT they'll minus a 1/4 of a mark for every wrong answer I put on. How fucking unfair is that?

Of course, that's just a blooming rumor.. I'm not sure how true it is. Some people say they don't, some people say they do. All I know is that USM cut my marks for my Accounting paper for every wrong answer. Why? Because apparently we were outperforming the Students in USM when it came to those papers. So to fit all these high marks into the Bell Curve, they had to cut down based on the wrong answers. What gives USM the right to do this? I'm under their franchise program in Taylor's College, where I can study in english and where I don't have to touch a single BM dictionary for a long long time.

Sigh, All I can do is hope that I pass or if I don't, it's another semester for me...

A Nice, Quiet Potluck

2005-11-13T16:21:00.000+08:00

Ahh, never had so much fun before last night. Had a little pot luck to celebrate the last day of classes and a sad farewell to the classmates. And the best part is that I didn't have to bring anything; Everyone else brought so much stuff that I didn't have to, well, except the ice la. Takkan I be so bad that won't bring a thing.

Arrived at Brenda's place around 7.50 and lo and behold, everyone's not there yet. Crummy Malaysian Timing... Around 8.15 only people started coming; Zijill came with fruit! Watermelons, Papayas and Oranges; an assortment of sizes too!

We first started by cutting the watermelon, which I could not resist making a very crude joke in my mind.

Indeed!

Yeap, indeed it entertained me for awhile, but seeing as the three of us (the three being Zijill, Brenda and myself) have had no experience cutting watermelon and the girls didn't have the strenght to push the buther's knife into the watermelon, I did it, with almost disastrous effect; almost lobbed off me bloody finger, I did! But it got chopped in half, and then the girls shoved me off =( to cut it themselves. Aww, damn and I wanted to help out in the kitchen so much.

...

Damn it Pam! I DID!!! (Meh, it's an insider joke, don't bother..)

...

But doesn't that watermelon loookkk gooooddddd?

Anyway, getting that damn thing cut was one matter. We also had a friend's birthday that day which me and Zijill took a short walk to Secret Recipe to buy a slice of Chocolate Banana Cake for her. Aside from that, we had Potato Salad, McDonalds Chicken McNuggets (I know, I know..) Lemon Cream Peach Pie, and a weird Orange Juice + Sprite + Longan mixed punch..

And Huey-Ling was late with the main course.. like 3 hours late!! But we had a surprise for her when she came!

And to be blunt, she was very very excited. No really, she actually screamed "HAMSTER!!!!!" when she saw the present. And she didn't just scream it once, she screamed it plenty of times. Woke up the whole house too.

And then Zijill fed her her cake.

And Huey-Ling showed her appreciation:

Yeah, welcome to my world... It's full of lesbians apparently.. Sigh..